I want to admit something to all of you: Sometimes I still cry because of how people treated me when I was obese. Because I stuffed all of my "negative" emotions deep inside my entire life, it's going to take some time to fully release them. I'm working on it, however, and making tremendous progress with healing myself on all levels. I'm not telling you these things so you'll feel sorry for me, however. I'm telling you because I am thankful for all the pain I endured. It shaped me (in more ways than just my physical appearance) into the person I am today.
Even though it sounds strange, and somehow wrong to feel this way, I'm thankful that I was obese. I'm thankful for all of the experiences during my life, even the extremely painful, traumatic ones. Maybe if I was a different kind of person I would wish that those things didn't happen to me. However, I am using those experiences in positive ways. They've helped me understand people even better, and to understand myself on a deeper level, as well. When people reach out to me it's not only because I'm an approachable person, it's because they sense that I understand them--and they're right. I DO understand them. I understand you. My experiences, coupled with my gift of empathy, help me relate to you in a way that maybe not everyone else is able to do.
When you share your sorrows with me, I feel them, too. When you ask for help, I feel your desperate desire to find a thread of hope to keep you from falling into the deep pit that you feel will swallow you up. When you ask for advice, I know you are trying to help yourself and you are searching for knowledge to be shared that you can possibly use for yourself. When you tell me you don't know why you have contacted me and shared so much about yourself, I feel your depression and loneliness. And when you share your triumphs, both small and large, I am overjoyed with you! That's the beauty of being an empath: I can feel not only your pain and suffering, I can share in your joy as well!
I love being the person I am. I love that I can relate to and understand so many of you on different levels. I love that you share yourselves with me, as much as I do myself with you. I am thankful for all that I've been through and I'm thankful that you have found me, have reached out and connected with me. Together we can grow stronger--and in doing so we can help even more individuals who haven't even started their search for something better, yet.
Today, and every other day, I am filled with gratitude for so very much. Thank you for being here with me on my journey, and for inviting me to share some of your journey with you.
I love all of you,
Wendi
XOXOXO
Original Comments
Below, we have included the original comments from this blog post. Additional comments may be made via Facebook, below.
On March 5, 2009, wrote:
Thank you for sharing this Wendi!!! I had wanted to go raw for a while, but it seemed so out of reach. Your story is the one that really did it for me. I read it, I cried because you were just like I am. It means so much that you know what it's like. If someone who was like me could change the way they eat, than maybe I can too.
So many people are prejudiced against anyone who is overweight. You are treated as less than, or invisible. People sometimes don't want to be your friend when you are overweight. I miss events because I know the comments from family that I will get. Even if they didn't, I am ashamed and embarrassed that I let myself get so obese.
But I know I can talk to you about it because you won't judge me. Thank you so much for all you share and give to us.
Big love and blessings,
Teresa
P.S. If agave says that it's raw on the bottle, is it OK?
On March 6, 2009, wrote:
Thanks Wendi for being you!
I wish there were alot more people who did not judge others on anything they have done in their lives, people need to walk in those people's shoes before commenting!
Just listening is a way of giving to others uncondtionally!
I understand alot of your comments Wendi and I agree with them!
You have opened my eyes, my mind to what could be and I what I could be!
Being part of the Pure Jeevan family is special!
Keep moving forward
sheryl canberra
australia
On March 6, 2009, wrote:
Wendy....what a great and amazingly wonderful bright light you are! Many thanks for you! Ann
On March 7, 2009, wrote:
Wendi , I am so glad you shared this painful part of you.. a part that has helped make you the kind loving soul you are today!
It is very sad that our society holds thin as important, and fat as "wrong". I wish we could all see each others hearts first and our bodies last.
love you
hugs
deb
On March 8, 2009, wrote:
I love reading your blog,and I relate to being heavy and lose weight lost 45 lbs 4 years ago,and on my road to a thinner self.Its amazing how one is treated when heavy then becomes thinner.We are all the same person at heart weather we are fat or thinner.Its a shame how one is treated at times.You are a sweetie from what I see on paper :-) I myself love raw and that same 45 lbs are back and I am eating Raw as a lifestyle in order to regain my health back since Oct 2008.
On March 8, 2009, wrote:
Oh Wendi, how eloquent of a writer you are! I love you too and feel so connected to you.
I am an empath too, so much so that I knew I could never go into "counseling" per se because I'd take everyone's "stories" and pain, home with me. I know exactly what you say you're "thankful for being obese". I am thankful for the struggles my body has gone through as well, asthma, overweight, too emotional, harboring negative emotions, all of it. Like you, I feel I am on a journey to figure things out, always growing, making progress in many areas. I also feel that eating raw food helps our bodies, not only in physical ways, but in other ways as well, such as you said, releasing emotions.
I've read some on this especially writing by David Wolfe which is just one reason I'm enjoying raw superfoods so much.
I've also used EFT (emotional freedom technique) to help me through my emotional release, yoga, etc. And yes I wish also it was a perfect world and we could see people's hearts, before their body (appearance, weight, and so on).
At any rate, I just wanted to jump in here and truly e-hug you and tell you - YOU make such a difference to me. You are special Wendi and I am so glad to know you!
On March 9, 2009, wrote:
empaths unite- from afar! it is important to be aware of these emotive levels of understanding- to survive as a sensitive person. not sensitive in the self-serving way- but in the bigger picture. just yesterday, i was thinking about the gift of being an empath myself, and the ways it has shaped and is shaping me today... and how it is a gift- even if it means that i must push through pain on a different level than most. it also connects us deeper, and the satisfaction therein is a treasure!
keep feeling, keep sharing!
~ violet
On March 9, 2009, wrote:
Aww...thanks, Ann! :-)
Lots of love to you,
Wendi
XOXOXO
On March 9, 2009, wrote:
Deb,
Thanks so much for all that you share, as well. I hope that one day we'll
see each other as we truly are, who we truly are, rather than how we may
appear. I agree it would be lovely if we all saw each others hearts,
first!
I love you, too!
Wendi
XOXOXO
On March 9, 2009, wrote:
Dianne,
Thank you for your comment. :-)
Congrats on eating raw since October! I'm sure you are feeling so many
wonderful changes within yourself!
Lots of love to you,
Wendi
XOXOXO
On March 9, 2009, wrote:
Thanks, MindXdreamz!
I have a feeling that many people who are drawn to raw foods are actually
empaths. I've sensed it in many raw foodists I have met. That's probably
why we all feel such a connection and sense of community when we meet each
other.
I've met and talked with David Wolfe a couple of times and he's most
likely an empath. I'm not so sure he realizes it, however. ;-)
Thanks for the e-hug and support!
Lots of love to you,
Wendi
XOXOXO
On March 9, 2009, wrote:
Violet, thanks so much for your comment. I think there are so many more of
us than we possibly even realize! I wouldn't doubt it if there is already
an empath gathering somewhere in the world. For me, being at the Raw
Spirit Festival felt like I was with so many people just like myself. I
wouldn't doubt it if most people drawn to raw foods are actually empaths.
Thanks for sharing and being a part of this community!
Lots of love to you,
Wendi
XOXOXO